{"id":2599,"date":"2012-06-06T08:45:32","date_gmt":"2012-06-06T12:45:32","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.gadflyonline.com\/wpblog\/?p=2599"},"modified":"2012-07-30T15:24:26","modified_gmt":"2012-07-30T19:24:26","slug":"bartender-oh-bartender-and-other-poems-by-matthew-harris","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/gadflyonline.com\/home\/index.php\/bartender-oh-bartender-and-other-poems-by-matthew-harris\/","title":{"rendered":"bartender – oh bartender! And Other Poems"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n

bartender – oh bartender!<\/span><\/p>\n

mine eyes espy the glory of the ending of another day work
\nwith no clue what role my efforts play in within the large scheme
\nand (psst) just between you and me…that new supervisor a real jerk
\nassigning my exemplary skills and talents what appears as a losing team!<\/p>\n

no way out of this death sentence nefarious trap
\nexcept to drown displeasure downing booze or even house brand beer
\nwhich drunken state the only way to prevent axons and synapses to snap
\nand quickly cause tenuous grasp on sanity to become rent asunder and tear!<\/p>\n

now, not a moment to delay
\nfor this conga line employer manned gravy train
\ndeparts the tracks seven minutes to five – hip hooray
\nwhereby i can anesthetize this sorely overtaxed brain!<\/p>\n

these remaining 420 seconds tick by like the pace of a snail
\nto this myopic eyes the clock seems to reverse itself in time
\nthis must be some cruel cheap trick holding hostage this randy male
\nwhose manly fuels excitement meeting babes reason i be like busta rhyme!<\/p>\n

hop on the bandwagon the aim
\nto get out from this cramped cubicle and make a made dash
\nfor fermented elixir cherished like some infatuation with a female flame
\nwhich magic to forget cares of an uncertain world wrought immediate in a flash!<\/p>\n

now the cogs, gears and wheels that turn, whir and spin
\nwithin me mental discerned centrifuge come to a grinding halt
\nas the modern day whistles blows closing time in that barely audible din
\nwhich means the motley crew will be heading to a favorite watering hole for ale or malt!<\/p>\n

ah, that cool amber liquid of the gods soothes the palate and the tongue
\nnothing (nada even bling) compares to dulling the senses under the sun
\nsipping high proof fermented beverage worth price of a headache to be stung
\ncome the morrow (being closer to week-end) flirt with getting drunk equals fun!<\/p>\n

upon drowning sorrows that cascade like some emotional waterfall
\ninside thine own rocky mountain psychic terrain gets numbed by liquor
\nuntil the next morning will find frame of mind obliterated akin to a major squall
\nfinding me embarrassed at previous nights’ antics that found me to laugh and snicker!<\/p>\n

SCREED AGAINST SACREMENT<\/span><\/p>\n

Protean nucleic processes polemic yield
\nexplosive diversification
\npunctuated diversification
\nStephen Jay Gould
\nPaleontological hypothesis
\nspawning sudden flora and fauna
\ncompeted against diametrically
\nopposed diatribe
\npairing diehard Religionists
\nversus Doubting Thomists
\nwhich Creationist advocates
\nthreatened non-believers
\nwith damnation and eternal punishment
\nBrethren of God thru tongue did wield.
\nPompous empiricists
\nfire and brimstone sermons
\nexcruciating punishment of soul
\nclaimants who refute
\nintelligent design theorists
\nwill meet scimitar and shield!<\/p>\n

Shana Aubrey Harris<\/span><\/p>\n

Jack (be septuagenarian nimble) Feinberg + Bobbie Ann Thornburgh our beloved daughter took zeal gravitated to ye like a biological father and mother within penn valley common weal
\nyet upon returning home (three or so doors down), she bursts into tears the hue of teal<\/p>\n

thus I (the de facto dada, mister momma, papa, et cetera) felt compelled words to write
\nin my trademark poetic trademark (johnnie come lately) style flush with sentiments trite
\nprofound, yet all spring from thine heart for affectionate older persons energetic quite<\/p>\n

whose unconditional love for this punim, who lacks the natural maternal bond from abby
\nwho (pray tell -keep this hush) often exhibits psychological angst and acts rather crabby
\nbut dons as her decked apparel an air of rare friendliness vis a vis via being rather gabby<\/p>\n

giving the impression of a bona fide kind, mortal, openly receptive harris wife
\nboot when shuttered up in confines of this place she called a \u201cprison\u201d awash with strife
\nwith venomous tongue that lashes at me, her family of origin and an insufferable life<\/p>\n

greatly impacts on two darling progeny of thy loins who mean more than money can buy
\nwhereby the prospect for any daughter\/mother loving bond did long ago on the vine die
\nimposing on this average, decent fellow (although secular in belief) wishes to up and fly<\/p>\n

far from daily despair evident to those who live under grievous downcast depressive state
\nwith figurative forks of mick jagged anger in which seems to occur at more frequent rate
\nfinding my fantasies wishing to be holed up with another to identify as a suitable mate
\nand dislike resigning remaining to many years with what might be a most unpleasant fate<\/p>\n

whence the unpredictable invisible hand of \u201cadam\u201d or \u201ceve\u201d brought a neighbor to ease
\nthis agonizing ongoing marital crevasse (growing inexorably wider) for thee to app peas
\nunmet emotional needs\/ wants of one lovely lass as ye can attest as both play and tease<\/p>\n

whose humble affinity for thee tender kisses and thy pugs + one cat, she seems to crave
\nsince NO affection shown by spouse, who loathes mutter in law sylvia zison – how grave
\nand projections that this husband this marriage, he doth newt wish to save
\nyet remains steadfast here on account o me precious progeny until their departure
\nthen a pleasant adieu, chow, fair thee well with his minimal belongings he will wave<\/p>\n

which forecast PLEASE KEEP under wraps – thou the legally wedded counterpart
\nwould not be the least bit surprised at such an outcome where ice cold feelings
\nbetwixt us oft times, she utters only expletive filled remarks & hatred from hear heart!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

bartender – oh bartender! mine eyes espy the glory of the ending of another day work with no clue what role my efforts play in within the large scheme and (psst) just between you and me…that new supervisor a real jerk assigning my exemplary skills and talents what appears as a losing team! no way […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":30,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[4,219,199],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/gadflyonline.com\/home\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2599"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/gadflyonline.com\/home\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/gadflyonline.com\/home\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/gadflyonline.com\/home\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/30"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/gadflyonline.com\/home\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2599"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"http:\/\/gadflyonline.com\/home\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2599\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3618,"href":"http:\/\/gadflyonline.com\/home\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2599\/revisions\/3618"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/gadflyonline.com\/home\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2599"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/gadflyonline.com\/home\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2599"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/gadflyonline.com\/home\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2599"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}