{"id":8737,"date":"2015-02-16T09:00:28","date_gmt":"2015-02-16T14:00:28","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.gadflyonline.com\/home\/?p=8737"},"modified":"2015-02-20T10:11:54","modified_gmt":"2015-02-20T15:11:54","slug":"a-collection-of-poems","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/gadflyonline.com\/home\/index.php\/a-collection-of-poems\/","title":{"rendered":"Words in a Motivation Seminar\u2026, Gratitude, & Vicious Cycle"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"binary\"<\/a><\/h3>\n

<\/h3>\n

Words in a Motivation Seminar: The Greatest Predictor<\/h3>\n

You are the graph, I am the social norm.
\nI am interested in making change as much as I am
\nan enemy of so-called common sense. I approve of keeping our rubbish in the appropriate places.
\nShow people they are doing something wrong
\nand they will thank you or hate you. Common sense leads the sheep astray or in lockstep
\nwith those jack-booted thugs and their greenhouse
\ngas emissions. Information is not enough. There are cracks in my foundation and chinks
\nin my armor. I see my character flaws as big
\nas a basketball that has no bounce. Make tangible the problems of personalized interaction
\nand flowers dying in the fall. Thousands of gallons
\nare wasted by a running toilet in three months. Visualize a swimming pool filled with dirty
\ndiapers filled by one young\u2019n in their babyhood.
\nColleges are full of alcohol abusers and summa cum laudes. My ideas have been available
\nsince 2009 with slightly different information
\nand learning outcomes. Six percent will notice no effect. Behavior changes attitudes about
\nenergy conservation and it\u2019s really you that\u2019s killing
\nthe planet. It ain\u2019t me, babe. No No No. Twirl your hands like a traffic cop directing the
\nuninitiated that have no expectations. Put placards above
\nlight switches encouraging everyone to engage in conserving behavior. Thus, there will be
\na 2.6% variation in actions, +\/- 3% margin of error.
\nI always wondered why you wore your hair that way. It speaks to your core value of frugality.
\nYou eliminate waste. Time, money, resources,
\nand comfortable shoes. I want to understand your values and if deprivation motivates you.
\nBut you are wrong about yourself, I know,
\nand can\u2019t really be counted on. I have found myself ineffective in my campaigns. Don\u2019t
\nlet common sense be your guide, ever.
\nYou are the social norm, I am the graph.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Gratitude<\/h3>\n

Authentic alliteration is apt to be an anomaly. Lots and lots of pies.
\nOnly buy items off a menu that have subtext and a kicky story. The story of the food.
\nUpdike\u2019s Sammy, home again, home again, jiggety jig,<\/em> Red Sammy\u2019s with the monkey tied
\nto a stake in O\u2019Connor\u2019s world of hard to find good men. Smell the bakery air and take<\/p>\n

unsanctioned naps. Take water for granted. Electricity too, and a roof
\nwith economical shingles. 2006 was a year in which the following occurred: I saw seals face
\nto face, my head grew .013%, I felt slightly faster, 56 or 7 million people died- give or take.
\nSome from natural causes. Some from loneliness, not to mention despair or parasites. Graduates<\/p>\n

will work for food and jerk soda for nickel tips. Start a website. Build. Lift.
\nSmile and flirt. There are often unannounced sales on Mondays. Hide your suit with the snappy
\npants in a rack for skinny men so the portly chef you know won\u2019t find it and purchase hope
\n(for a date) before you do. Step back a few steps and summarize what you see. Arrogance has<\/p>\n

a price and a discount. Arrows arranged anywhere. There\u2019s that alliteration
\nagain. Somebody hit me two times. A cousin lives in one of those Phoenix suburbs made of
\nsandcastles and works as a landscaper without water. Rocks make good friends. They\u2019re quiet
\nand smooth and believe in global warming. See the world for the first time. Deacon Jones<\/p>\n

invented the quarterback sack and had more than you ever will even
\nif no one counted. My memories make the most sense in binary code as we can better distinguish
\nbetween olives and cold cuts and those times when I cried. Say thank you to someone even if
\nyou have no reason. Just do it, swoosh\u2122, and thank me later.<\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n

Vicious Cycle<\/h3>\n

If you are Achilles, who is Hector?<\/p>\n

Perseus rode Pegasus in Clash of the Titans<\/em> which
\nis to Greek mythology what megachurch barkers are to
\nChristianity which is to religion a fad diet which is to Atkins,
\nPaleo, or frogs legs. The choice is yours, but understand that your
\nchoice will impact my calorie intake which impacts my sperm count
\nwhich impacts my wife loving me which impacts my self-worth which
\nimpacts whether I pull the trigger. In days of yore, I would not have been
\nable to read unless I were privileged which would have led me to attract a buxom
\ngal with wide birthin\u2019 hips and a substantial dowry of meats and cheese leading to strong finely
\nstocked children that would go to war against the infidels and contribute to the survival of
\nthe fittest leading to solemn negotiations and tenuous peace treaties inevitably broken
\nleading to the starvation of children covered in flies and feces. Primordial ooze
\nevolved into bacteria which evolved into a sea slug growing legs and stepping
\non to land leading to the over-consumption of our resources ending in our
\nspecies\u2019 demise which would lead to quiet and still and vacancy. There
\nwould only be records left behind that spoke of a warrior by name of
\nAchilles that started the whole damn mess and he was me.<\/p>\n

It was my fault all along.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\n

William Yazbec is a writer and teacher based in Madison, Wisconsin. His poetry collection, “40 Days 40 Thieves,” is forthcoming in February from Vivat Libro Press and his first novel, “Revved Up Like a Deuce” will be published in 2015. He currently teaches at the University of Wisconsin-Platteville.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

You are the graph, I am the social norm.
\nI am interested in making change as much as I am
\nan enemy of so-called common sense. I approve of keeping our rubbish in the appropriate places.
\nShow people they are doing something wrong
\nand they will thank you or hate you. Common sense leads the sheep astray or in lockstep
\nwith those jack-booted thugs and their greenhouse
\ngas emissions. Information is not enough. <\/p>\n

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