{"id":8836,"date":"2015-02-20T09:00:11","date_gmt":"2015-02-20T14:00:11","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.gadflyonline.com\/home\/?p=8836"},"modified":"2015-02-25T10:05:43","modified_gmt":"2015-02-25T15:05:43","slug":"ripple-of-water","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/gadflyonline.com\/home\/index.php\/ripple-of-water\/","title":{"rendered":"Ripple of Water, Destructive Whirlwind, and Words of a Man"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"whirlwind\"<\/a><\/h3>\n

 <\/p>\n

Ripple of Water<\/h3>\n

I am a ripple of water
\nStretching
\nFurther and further outward
\nMoving gracefully, slowly
\nSteadily I wade through
\nBack in my element
\nVoyaging into a cozy stream
\nMingling with new waters
\nLeaving behind old ones
\nOnto the next wet world
\nA lake sitting by the park
\nA few geese waddling
\nDipping their beaks into water
\nQuenching their thirst
\nA kaleidoscope of fishes
\nBusying themselves with purpose
\nNavigating the lake with skill
\nOn I go to a connecting line
\nAnd arrive at an enticing river
\nWith a psychedelic presence
\nAnd a serenely sweet ambiance
\nIt invites me
\nAnd I ride its wave joyfully
\nBasking in its hospitable charm
\nHolding me
\nSwinging me
\nTossing me
\nThisa way
\nAnd thatta way
\nI\u2019m immersed in this cooling relaxation
\nAlmost to the point of no return
\nI drift deeper
\nSuspended in water travel
\nFeeling the freest I ever have
\nUnlimited bliss
\nAll within my outstretched reach
\nAs I depart
\nI receive an unforgettable goodbye
\nAs I move on
\nI squeeze through a dark narrow flow
\nDiscomfort emerges
\nImmobility strikes
\nOnly for a moment
\nThinking what\u2019s next?
\nWhere will I end up now?
\nAs I make my way to the end of the unfamiliar current
\nI reach my ultimate destination
\nWhere the water is vast
\nAnd adorned by the sun
\nClouds draping the scenery peacefully
\nWide open space
\nI know you as the sea
\nI see you as boundless
\nMy spacious playground
\nWith so many acquaintances to make
\nSo many wonders waiting to be discovered
\nWill I reach your depths?
\nWill I transform into a tidal wave?
\nDo as you please with me
\nI\u2019ll never leave
\nThis breathtaking arena of calmness
\nAllows me to appreciate nature\u2019s aesthetic simplicity
\nI\u2019m connected
\nTo a force more powerful than an army of soldiers equipped for war
\nI\u2019m a ripple of water
\nWho\u2019s finally found my place
\nAnd a sense of belonging
\nI shall branch out and explore the sea\u2019s expanse
\nMeet and greet
\nSpeak and seek
\nI shall undertake to receive the utmost possible
\nHere I am
\nAnd here goes nothing<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Destructive Whirlwind<\/h3>\n

It feels like ice shackling your veins
\nIt looks like a terrorizing storm in the night
\nIt smells like the bowels of a skunk
\nIt sounds like despondent souls burning
\nIt tastes like sour milk blended with rotten eggs
\nThis is the downward spiral
\nThat has engulfed my deteriorated existence
\nTears drown my eyes
\nSnot oozes from my nose
\nMy face sweats out the pain
\nAll I want is someone to hold
\nMy mouth opens and poison is released
\nThough it departs from me there is more left inside
\nThe poison turns into venom and tells me I cannot hide<\/p>\n

So I run
\nHoping that I will find warmth
\nLight
\nSweetness
\nLaughs
\nAnd contentment
\nI want the rhythm of life
\nMy body starts to ache
\nMy mind starts to pulsate rigorously
\nMy heart beats slower and slower
\nHarder and harder<\/p>\n

I don\u2019t know if I\u2019ll make it
\nI don\u2019t know if I can hold on any longer
\nI am falling deeper and deeper
\nInto an abysmal void
\nWhere no one can hear the echoes of my scream<\/p>\n

I am dropping off the face of the earth
\nThe wind keeps slapping me in the face
\nMy world is painted black
\nAnd so are my brain cells
\nI am broken
\nAnd I\u2019m almost positive that I will never come back<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Words of a Man<\/h3>\n

The words of a man
\nCan make your knees tremble and shake
\nUntil eventually they start to buckle
\nAnd you fall\u2026hard
\nFinding yourself smashed into a million shattered, un-repairable pieces
\nYou\u2019re in the middle of his palm
\nWith each word he tightens his grip
\nEach compliment pushes you further and further into this bubble of ecstasy
\nAfter weeks fly by
\nYou ask yourself
\nWho else has heard the same set of words I have from his lips?
\nNo!
\nHow many others are consumed with this hypnotizing spell,
\nYour mouth gave birth to?
\nYou\u2019re deep in
\nNow your feelings have surpassed \u2018like\u2019
\nHe\u2019s built you up to the point that you envision a future
\nA whole entire life!
\nYou\u2019re deep in alright
\nBecause he is the only he
\nThe only one your eyes allow you to see
\nThe only smell that makes you weak
\nDoes he really feel the same exact way?
\nThis can\u2019t be one-sided
\nThis has to be real
\nBecause you grow warm inside at the sight of him
\nYou anticipate his touch
\nAnd the strength of his arms holding you
\nThe thought of dying in his embrace comforts you
\nNow it seems he is all you have
\nNo one else
\nBecause they don\u2019t understand
\nAnd they never will!
\nThen his appetite for you shifts
\nHe wants less and less of you
\nBecause of this excuse and that one too
\nYou feel the wedge
\nYou become suspicious of what you have
\nIn the middle of the night
\nA voice tells you to check his phone
\nFirst the call log
\nPlenty of un-stored numbers
\nYou find a pen and a crumpled piece of paper
\nAnd jot all of them down
\nNext are \u00a0the text messages
\nMy, my, my!
\nSo much to see
\nSo much that you didn\u2019t want to see
\nSo much that your ears have heard before
\nWords
\nThe words from this man has infiltrated the minds of others
\nYou start to feel heat melting your heart away
\nThen your mind flashes back to when you were brand new
\nYou remember how special you were to him\u2026back then
\nFast forward now
\nAnd everything is up for questioning
\nEVERYTHING
\nYou wake him up to a livid woman with sorrowful streams of tears
\nA beam of light that reveals his transgressions
\nHe\u2019s caught off guard
\nThere\u2019s nothing to say
\nAll there is, is an angry woman
\nWho is left to reevaluate what she thought she had
\nWhile trying to differentiate the real parts from the fake ones
\nIt\u2019s over at least that\u2019s what your madness says
\nYou tear up all of his shit
\nAnd destroy the place you and him shared
\nIt\u2019s over
\nAt least that what your bruised heart says
\nYou feel manipulated
\nAnd betrayed
\nAnd foolish
\nAnd utterly stupid
\nYou feel like a plastic piece to a game that he maneuvered the entire time
\nWhat do you do now?
\nWhere do you turn?
\nYou pick yourself up
\nAnd leave
\nAnd go to the ones you erased out of your life
\nAnd beg for forgiveness
\nAfter spilling the gut-wrenching contents of your soul
\nYou go off by yourself and remember all those words
\nThat created this superficial realm of what you thought love was
\nAnd vow to never let the words of a man seep into your heart<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\n

Zanya Rascoe is a senior at Cuny Hunter College.\u00a0She will receive her B.A.\u00a0in English in May.\u00a0She has been writing since the age of seven and aspires to publish her own volume of poetry and teach secondary English literature. Her hobbies include going to open mics\/spoken word events,\u00a0reading self-help,\u00a0fiction,\u00a0historical fiction,\u00a0biographies and of course poetry,\u00a0and surrounding herself with family,\u00a0friends, and, food.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I am a ripple of water
\nStretching
\nFurther and further outward
\nMoving gracefully, slowly
\nSteadily I wade through
\nBack in my element<\/p>\n

READ MORE.<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":257,"featured_media":8899,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[4,219,199,217],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/gadflyonline.com\/home\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8836"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/gadflyonline.com\/home\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/gadflyonline.com\/home\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/gadflyonline.com\/home\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/257"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/gadflyonline.com\/home\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=8836"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"http:\/\/gadflyonline.com\/home\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8836\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":8900,"href":"http:\/\/gadflyonline.com\/home\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/8836\/revisions\/8900"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/gadflyonline.com\/home\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/8899"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/gadflyonline.com\/home\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=8836"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/gadflyonline.com\/home\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=8836"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/gadflyonline.com\/home\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=8836"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}